And now . . . this - Feb. 11/05

A good reason why light beer sucks

A man may have found out firsthand just how nasty the competition is between the world's two biggest beermakers.

Isac Aguero, 24, said he was fired from his job with a Miller Brewing distributor, the same day a picture appeared in The Journal Times of Racine of him drinking a Bud Light, which is brewed by Anheuser-Busch Co.

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For the record, I prefer Upper Canada ales, and I don't work for Labatt's or Molson.

Moosehead, on the other hand . . .

The former girlfriend of a truck driver charged with stealing more than 50,000 cans of Moosehead beer says he sent her a birthday card signed "the beer bandit." . . .

Police told the court most of the beer was not recovered, although several stashes of the stolen suds turned up at various locations in the province. The beer cans were distinctive because of Spanish labeling.

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Party at my place. Bring your own cerveza. 8-)

Riots are unböring, aren't they?

A man was stabbed and five other people were taken to hospital after thousands of customers caused a stampede at the midnight opening of a new IKEA furniture store in north London, British authorities said Thursday.

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Sounds like a typical weekend at IKEA. Who knew people would be so passionate about semi-disposable Scandinavian furniture?

Gay rights for penguins?

A plan by a German zoo to test the sexual appetites of a group of suspected homosexual penguins has sparked outrage among gay and lesbian groups, who fear zookeepers might force them to turn straight. . . .

[A zoo spokesman] said the zoo concluded the penguins might be gay after seeing male penguins trying to mate with other males and trying to hatch offspring out of stones.

German media reported that female Swedish penguins would be brought to the zoo to test the theory, but when word got out about the plan, the phones started ringing.

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That's just super, thanks for asking!