June 23, 2005

KJV-onlyism: Now with 20% more ignorance

It's always good to go to bed on a high note, and the latest nitwittery from the KJV-onlyists, those "fools for Christ," has made my day.

A KJV-onlyist calling himself KJV4ME (strike 1: lame screen name) on the Fightin' Fundamentalist Forum, where the free and unmoderated format has the downside of allowing anyone to post without a license, posted one of the usual ridiculous macros this evening. What caught my eye, however, was the following dubious factoid:

Having militarily defeated Rome, a spiritual defeat was now necessary. The Geneva Bible commonly used was from the Catholic mainland, and as such was tainted. As God's Word commands separation from unbelievers, England, separated by water and military might from the Catholic mainland was now set to take up her pre ordained place in history.

Two notes:

  • This is guilt by association of the grossest sort. The "logic," to use the word in its loosest possible meaning, goes something like this: Roman "Catholicism" comes from Europe. The Geneva Bible comes from Europe. Therefore, the Geneva Bible is tainted with Roman Catholicism. (Put another way: Rice comes from China. Pandas come from China. Therefore, pandas are made of rice.)
  • The Geneva Bible was translated in 1560 by expatriate Puritans living in Calvin's Geneva. As such, its evangelical credentials are considerably more solid than the overtly Anglican King James Bible.

KJV4ME closes his missive with this parting shot: "Once they remove the King James Bible as the authority for Christendom, the 2nd coming will follow shortly." Put another way, in order to hasten the return of Jesus, just switch to the NIV. Sounds like an endorsement to me.

Postscript: It's a con! "KJV4ME" admitted yesterday to being a "satire-loving troll," after posting an over-the-top follow-up that was still very clever (and nonetheless a major temptation not to deliver a good fisking). What you read above, though, remains the sort of gross ignorance and logical foolishness the KJVers like to employ, and it wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if another one (with a slight reading comprehension difficulty) starts putting such claims forward in all seriousness. We shall see.